When we feel sad or blue we usually are less perky and have less energy. We feel disinterested in our regular social activities, may retreat from our loved ones and friends for a temporary period of time, and usually our thoughts turn inward. In a nutshell, during these normal periods of "the blues" we slow down physically and tend to focus on our inner mental life. Our culture is consumed with pop psychology books, television shows, and social media giving us advice about how not to be sad and what to do as soon as we begin to feel sad. It takes only a split second to find thousands of internet sites devoted to telling us how to be happy or happier than we already feel. Many of these sites post daily quotes of inspiration with hopes of turning a frown into a smile and we have been conditioned to "treat" our sadness as soon as the first "symptom" appears. We do not recognize the benefits of "working through" our emotions and instead seek out quick fix cures.
This attitude is unfortunate because quick fixes oftentimes miss their target. That is, a quick fix rarely resolves the real issue that was causing your "blues" in the first place. Getting to underlying issues and/or problems that are underneath your sadness or the blues requires reflection and reflection requires time and patience, all of which is the opposite of a quick fix. Working through difficult times and allowing yourself to feel painful emotions can actually lead to positive life changes. It is through suffering that we come to realize what it is that is truly impacting our lives negatively. Expecting to always be happy and feeling compelled to shelve or avoid our emotions of sadness or the "blues" has the potential to stunt our ability to recognize the necessary changes we need to make in order to experience a fuller and more satisfying life. Essentially, having the blues, feeling down in the dumps, or just plain sad gives us time "off" from our hectic lives and time "on" for reflection and re-evaluation. You may even find out that by working through what made you sad in the first place is what leads to your happiness in your future!
This article was written by Paula Durlofsky, Ph.D. I am a practicing psychologist in Bryn Mawr, PA. Email any questions or comments to drpauladurlofsky@gmail.com. You can visit my web page at
www.drpauladurlofsky.com to learn more about me and my practice.
.
This is a very interesting theory which I feel is quite true. Even though it's a little different, it calls to mind the book Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Ablom. It's been a while since I read it, but one part that has always stuck with me is how the professor who is slowly dying has the philosophy that whenever he feels despair overcoming him he allows himself to feel it. He takes a few minutes to let it wash over him every morning and tries to feel it as intensely as possible and then he let's it go. The idea being that if he tried to ignore it or suppress it that it will just build up inside and nag him all day, but if he lets himself feel it then he can get on with his day and feel happy. I've always wondered if I could adopt that philosophy.
ReplyDeleteI don't have anything as hard to face as that but I think I am pretty well balanced when it comes to managing my emotions. Just yesterday I had an unexpected bout of sadness while I was discussing some holiday plans with my husband. At first I didn't know why I was feeling upset, but I struggled through the barrier by continuing to talk with my husband, and he was very sweet and supportive as he listened to me work it out. At last my explanations and suppositions at to why I must be feeling unhappy led to tears, but afterward I felt better and about an hour later I came to a few new ideas for how to approach the future holiday we had been previously discussing which I think will be a much better way to celebrate it. Much simpler and less stressful and I couldn't help but feel glad that I had worked through those feelings even though when I started to get upset my first impulse was to walk away and stop talking about it, but I'm glad I didn't do that because then I might not have come to the new conclusions that I came to.
Hi Julie,
DeleteThank you for your insightful comment. It's great to hear that you allow yourself the opportunity to feel your emotions and find effective solutions to difficult situations. Good luck with your holiday plans. I hope you and husband enjoy them.
-Paula Durlofsky, Ph.D.
otr214427
ReplyDeleteINTERNATIONAL CONCEPT OF WORK FROM HOME
Work from home theory is fast gaining popularity because of the freedom and flexibility that comes with it. Since one is not bound by fixed working hours, they can schedule their work at the time when they feel most productive and convenient to them. Women & Men benefit a lot from this concept of work since they can balance their home and work perfectly. People mostly find that in this situation, their productivity is higher and stress levels lower. Those who like isolation and a tranquil work environment also tend to prefer this way of working. Today, with the kind of communication networks available, millions of people worldwide are considering this option.
Women & Men who want to be independent but cannot afford to leave their responsibilities at home aside will benefit a lot from this concept of work. It makes it easier to maintain a healthy balance between home and work. The family doesn't get neglected and you can get your work done too. You can thus effectively juggle home responsibilities with your career. Working from home is definitely a viable option but it also needs a lot of hard work and discipline. You have to make a time schedule for yourself and stick to it. There will be a time frame of course for any job you take up and you have to fulfill that project within that time frame.
There are many things that can be done working from home. A few of them is listed below that will give you a general idea about the benefits of this concept.
Baby-sitting
This is the most common and highly preferred job that Women & Men like doing. Since in today's competitive world both the parents have to work they need a secure place to leave behind their children who will take care of them and parents can also relax without being worried all the time. In this job you don't require any degree or qualifications. You only have to know how to take care of children. Parents are happy to pay handsome salary and you can also earn a lot without putting too much of an effort.
Nursery
For those who have a garden or an open space at your disposal and are also interested in gardening can go for this method of earning money. If given proper time and efforts nursery business can flourish very well and you will earn handsomely. But just as all jobs establishing it will be a bit difficult but the end results are outstanding.
Freelance
Freelance can be in different wings. Either you can be a freelance reporter or a freelance photographer. You can also do designing or be in the advertising field doing project on your own. Being independent and working independently will depend on your field of work and the availability of its worth in the market. If you like doing jewellery designing you can do that at home totally independently. You can also work on freelancing as a marketing executive working from home. Wanna know more, email us on workfromhome.otr214427@gmail.com and we will send you information on how you can actually work as a marketing freelancer.
Internet related work
This is a very vast field and here sky is the limit. All you need is a computer and Internet facility. Whatever field you are into work at home is perfect match in the software field. You can match your time according to your convenience and complete whatever projects you get. To learn more about how to work from home, contact us today on workfromhome.otr214427@gmail.comand our team will get you started on some excellent work from home projects.
Diet food
Since now a days Women & Men are more conscious of the food that they eat hence they prefer to have homemade low cal food and if you can start supplying low cal food to various offices then it will be a very good source of income and not too much of efforts. You can hire a few ladies who will help you out and this can be a good business.
Thus think over this concept and go ahead.